Major in the Minors, post 1

Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

Ephesians 6:1-4 Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. Honor your father and mother which is the first commandment with a promise—that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth. Fathers, do not exasperate your children, instead, bring them up in the training and instruct ion of the Lord.

It’s been a frustrating morning. I have persisted in encouraging, nagging, pointing out, the need for the girls to take care of their things—pick up the rooms. An age old battle, but it brought to mind a question. How do I get them to value what I value—or at least associate more value on the caretaking of their space?

My initial thought was to tie it to something they value, like an i-pod or cell phone, or, this morning-- both. There is a practical, logical feel to that solution.

Then, I thought is there a faith component to this, my immediate answer was yes, and I happily (full of pride) pulled out the scriptures above to back me up.

Yet, I wonder if I am training correctly—what is the way a child should go? My oldest, a high schooler, yesterday applied for a job. The circumstances behind this act required her to manage through some disappointment, some hurt pride and humbly take initiative in spite of it. She sailed through that important task and test beautifully. Really, it was an impressive real world step of maturity. However, the workout clothes were still stuffed in the corner of the closet. What’s a mama to do?

She also navigated through the sorrow and shock of a class mate’s suicide last week, comforting her friends, asking the right questions, attending the funeral service, praying for the family who lost their son. However, her makeup is sitting exposed like Japan’s nuclear rods next to the makeup case on the floor of her room. What’s a mama to care about?

After thinking this through and finishing their laundry, I wonder how to find a faithful perspective. They do need to learn to be responsible for their stuff and also aware that mismanagement of their stuff affects those (mamas) around them. However, I wonder what part of my heart, mind, thoughts, words are dedicated to the clutter and what are dedicated to relationships, work, ministry.

I need to take care not to train the girls up to be tidy, but faithful (and yes, responsible). I need to give thanks, praise and notice when they walk in obedience to God first and foremost.

Any thoughts on the tension of not just avoid majoring in the minors but also remember to major in the majors.

Silence Would Have Been A Better Option

Losing it.  I have lost perspective.  Materials for Bible Study just arrived (a bit beat up) an hour ago, after much, too much, fretting on my part.  I want to distribute these materials, I ordered them well in advance of class--and yet the ice storm and size of materials created a SLOW delivery.

I had to adjust and hand out copies of the first lesson.   Observing my reaction, one would have concluded  I had to sacrifice my freedoms, my family and my pet. 

I yielded hard to the temptation of over-reaction.  Armed with a few facts in my favor, I aimed some tense comments at the distribution customer service person who "only" apologized.  Not only am I embarrassed but my husband and daughter gently but directly told me I went from being rightly frustrated to righteously obsessed and angry. 

Over Bible study material--Experiencing the Heart of Jesus workbooks to be exact. 

I imagine I need to get into this study immediately, given the whole irony of it.   I wonder what the lady thought yesterday afternoon as she pulled up my order to see what I was so upset about?  25 copies of Experiencing the Heart of Jesus--I suspect she agreed, I needed that kind of teaching,  pronto.

What have I learned?  One, follow up with my own apology.  Two, confess, that is where you and prayer come into play.  Three, in the future plan and pray for how to handle this thing.  Example, focus on solving the problem not punishing or shaming the other person into solving the problem.  Focus on why it is important to me not how upset I am that it's not working out.   Live with some disappointment, life is not tidy and I hold up people too.  Ask for forgiveness when I forget these lessons.  Return to this entry when confronted again. 

There are lots of hurting people I am praying for and worried about who are facing real challenges, real brokenness.  Two of them have powerful and honest blogs that capture there "stuff".  It's a humble reminder to keep perspective on what is real and what is just really not that big a deal.
Joy In The Journey
The Simple Wife
Both are worthy of your consideration, and prayer.